Random Things I've Noticed

Maybe being 41 brings about some more acute ability to see the world around you.  Or, maybe I just spend more time staring at people, but here are a few things I've noticed as of late:

1.  This is a dead horse, and yes I'm going to say it again!  Leggings are NOT pants!  If your blouse, top, shirt, or sweater does not cover the cheeks of your hiney, you should wear some real pants, sister!  I can't tell you how many cheeks I've watched wiggling. Not a pleasure, friends.

2.  First graders can explain the weirdest things in ways that make sense in the end.  Here's a gem:  "Mrs. Bonds, if I smell like poop today, don't worry!  It's not me, it's chicken poop on my shoes."

3.  Sometimes the difference in two people with similar circumstances is the choice between being a victim and being an overcomer.  Bad crap happens to us all.  (See chicken poop post above.)  It's all about what you choose to do about it.

4.  Turning forty-one did take away my ability to see the people I stare at clearly.  Yesterday, I picked up new glasses.  They have transition lenses.  That's the "40 is the new 20" way of saying trifocals. Personally, I appreciate this gentle way of easing me into future cataract surgery.

5.  If you are drunk, do not attempt to understand the Wal-Greens customer reward card.  I only say this because of my unfortunate experience of being in line behind such a man at Wal-Greens today. Regardless of the many and varied attempts of the nice cashier lady to explain that the gentlemen could enjoy coupons, customer loyalty points, etc. for using said card, the poor guy just couldn't comprehend why she needed his phone number, nor why giving it to her wouldn't make his case of Coors Light free.  Dude, you don't need any more beer! But after dealing with you, I think the cashier might need a couple!

6.  If you are the subject of a court case that involves questionable moral activities (to put it mildly) you should consider taking your phone call about said case in a more secluded place than the office of the eye doctor.  You know the folks in there have lost the acuity of one sense, so the others become more prominent!

7.  Seattle Seahawks.......A PASS, REALLY?  I wasn't even hoping you'd win and still I shake my head.

8.  If you are a news reporter, you should be able to read and pronounce the word, "coordinator".  This morning, I heard a reporter on the radio pronounce it "cord nat ture".  There is a new "cord nat ture" of something in Tucson.  I was too busy trying to decipher that debacle to catch the rest.

9.  Jeff bought a Fit Bit scale.  It's super snazzy.  It says I weigh four pounds more than our old scale.  I hate the Fit Bit scale.

10.  A spider was on the faucet of my kitchen sink today.  Enough said.

Dear 2015,

I thought yesterday and still today about what would be a meaningful and lofty New Year's resolution.  I don't typically make resolutions, as keeping up with the things I normally desire to do is enough for me.  But as today unfolded, I found a couple of things that I now would formally like to resolve to approach with caution, if not avoid altogether.

Resolution #1 - Approach the sun visor in the car with extreme caution!  Let me preface this by saying I've employed the use of a sun visor for the entirety of my career as a driver.  I, like my Dad, am extremely sensitive to the sun in my eyes.  Therefore, I very frequently use my sun visor.  I use it folded straight down to keep the sun out of my eyes when it is directly in front of me.  I twist it to the side to avoid the face burning glare that can sometimes occur.  Seeing how it's not a complicated instrument, I wouldn't have considered it to be resolution worthy.  Today's unfortunate incident taught me otherwise.  As Jeff finished adding air to the tires in our vehicle, we were backing away from the air pump.  (By the way, the QT Store in Oro Valley has free air if you find yourself in need of some.)  The reverse motion caused a shift in the angle that the sun was hitting our windshield, so I attempted to adjust the sun visor.  Well, here's where the danger commenced!  The visor had somehow become a bit stuck in its present position and was hesitant to be moved.  I was rather persistent in my desire to move said visor to keep the sun from blinding me.  In this visor verses Stacey tug of war, the visor cried, "Uncle!"  Of course it didn't have the decency to make this audible, so therefore I was caught rather off guard when it suddenly gave up its position.  This, combined with my heroic efforts to move the visor, created the perfect storm of circumstances in which the visor popped out of its little holder and popped me right in the face.  I must say, I was quite surprised at the strength of the hit a visor can muster.  That little sucker hurt!  I know you must be wondering what valiant efforts my first responder, studly husband did in response to this attack on my person?  I would like to say he immediately ripped the offending visor off in a fit of rage at the injury it had inflicted upon me.  But alas, he was too busy laughing till he cried to be of any assistance whatsoever.  I'm pretty sure he spent more time studying the steaks that were on sale at the grocery store we went to after the fact.  I know, a man has to keep his priorities in order and all. (Those better be some good steaks, that's all I have to say about that!)

Resolution #2 - Aluminum foil is not your friend!  So the first responder, studly hubs bought those steaks.  He smoked them in a handy smoker/pressure cooker his mom sent us for Christmas.  (Quite a handy little kitchen appliance, might I add!) He cut them up and added them to a quite yummy salad that we enjoyed for dinner.  After the lovely dinner was over, I proceeded to begin cleaning the kitchen.  One of the first things I wanted to do was to cover the remaining salad and put it in the fridge.  I considered using Saran wrap for the job, but since the bowl was plastic, I didn't think that it would stick.  So, I decided to use the old standby, aluminum foil.  Like sun visors, I've used foil for years.  Never have I thought to approach the aluminum foil with trepidation.  I grabbed that box of heavy duty foil all willy nilly and tore off a big ole piece to cover my salad bowl.  With a fling of the wrist, I draped that shiny square over that bowl and proceeded to position it accordingly.  In my haste to preserve tonight's dinner for tomorrow's lunch, I managed to run my pinkie finger along the edge of said foil. In case you're like me and are ignorant of the dangers inherent to foil, let me enlighten you. Foil has a very sharp edge! This edge can run stealthily across your skin, fileting it in the process.  This is what happened to me. First, for just a second, I pondered the chance that my finger had been cut completely off.  Then, I took a deep breath and totally whimpered like a child.  Next, I inspected the damage and found that bright red blood was already beginning to pour from the wound. Once again, I know you are thinking that first responder, studly hubs jumped up and instantly began administering first aide with the utmost care and concern!  Uh, not so much.  Instead, from his position on the recliner, he commented that he'd never heard of someone cutting themselves on aluminum foil and that I should apply pressure to it to stop the bleeding.  So much for the crazy measures to which I picture him frequently leaping.  I must say, however, that he did complete the kitchen clean up, and in the process very bravely faced the sinister aluminum foil that was out to kill us.  I took over his spot on the recliner and held my pinkie finger in a paper towel, applying pressure while it continued to bleed and hurt a lot might I add.

So, those are my resolutions for this year.  Being that resolutions are about improving oneself, I think they fit the bill.  I will face the new year with less red whelts on my forehead and less gashes on my pinkie fingers.  Please use my story as a cautionary tale!  Avoid sun visors and aluminum foil! 

Happy 2015,

Stacey  

Weary and Worried

Dear Flagstaff Police Officer Tyler Stewart,

To say thank you for your service seems to be such an insignificant platitude at this time.  Today, in the line of duty, you lost your life.  You responded to a normal call for a patrol officer, a call involving domestic violence.  In response to this call, you were shot in the face by a coward.  A coward that after shooting you, took his own life.  At 24 years old, you are almost the same age as my son.  My heart hurts to think of the crippling loss your mother is feeling tonight.  I wish I could hug her and tell her how much I admire your bravery and how very sad I am for her loss.  I know my words could do nothing to ease her pain but I still wish I could share with her the overwhelming respect and admiration I hold for your family.  For the past fifteen years I've become acutely aware of the demands of your job.  I've watched as my husband and his coworkers have responded to hundreds of calls just like the one you went to today.  They, like you, didn't hesitate to heed the call of duty required by their job.  They leave their own homes and family to protect strangers.  I've personally witnessed bravery and commitment beyond measure.  I've seen tears shed over situations that are too heartbreaking to describe.  I've seen generosity as officers donated money to those that were in need, a kidney to a child with a life threatening illness, and personal time to help people in our community.
In the United States today, police officers are vilified by many.  We see so called "community activists" call for your life on the news.  These people hide behind the very freedom of speech that you and our armed forces protect.  I am just one person in a sea of loud voices crying out for various forms of justice.  This voice, my voice, is crying out for respect and gratitude for the job that cost you your life.  Through your sacrifice comes another example of what officers across this country are willing to do every day.  May you and your family know that although it is a small token at a time of such loss, we thank you.  We thank you for your bravery.  We thank you for your service.  We thank you for standing watch over us.  May God bless your family and may you rest in peace.

With the utmost respect,
Stacey

Taking the Plunge

Over the past couple of years, my random ramblings have covered topics from what not to wear at the dentist office, to chastising bad drivers in my neighborhood, to reliving fond memories from my childhood.  Some are things that I find frustrating, some are topics that amuse me, and others are things that warm my heart.  Through them all, several people have encouraged me to somehow collect them in one location.  Many people suggested a book, but I can't imagine someone would publish my inane ramblings.  Maybe they would make good reading while one is in the bathroom, experiencing a layover at an airport, or stuck in a traffic jam on the freeway, but since these times are not ones that most people consider joyous life events, the thought of a book just didn't seem to be ideal.  Thus the idea for a blog was born.   So, welcome to a collection of my thoughts and experiences.  Maybe some will make you laugh, maybe others will make you think, and maybe the rest will make you wonder.  

Blogging,

Stacey